Zeenat Aman calls herself a comeback queen, opens up on painful marriage phase

Zeenat Aman has said her return to films with the 1989 film Gawaahi came at a time when her marriage to actor-director Mazhar Khan was beginning to fall apart. Sharing a behind-the-scenes clip from the film on Instagram, the 74-year-old actor called herself a "comeback queen" and said the project became associated, in her mind, with both a career comeback.

Making the film, she said, was not only about returning to work after motherhood. It was also, in her words, a way to "escape" her personal life and hold on to an identity beyond being a daughter, mother and wife. Aman said that when the script came to her, the "rosy picture of domestic bliss" she had once imagined was fading, and work offered her a way to steady herself.

A return during a personal crisis

"Gawaahi was shot in 1988, two years after the birth of my first son, Azaan and just before the conception of my second born, Zahaan," she wrote. By then, she said, cracks had begun to show in her marriage.

The actor added, "At this point in my life, the rosy picture of domestic bliss that I had conjured up while at the peak of my career was beginning to fade. Marriage and motherhood had both arrived, but the former was starting to show cracks."

She was living with her mother in South Bombay, along with her son Azaan, when the script for the film arrived.

Zeenat further shared that there was once a time when she wanted to step away from her professional life, but at that point she wanted to step away from her personal life instead. With her "amazing Amma" helping care for Azaan, Aman accepted the role of Janhvi Kaul, a woman accused of murder in the courtroom drama.

Why the film stayed with her

Aman said the film was a low-budget courtroom drama based on Ayn Rand's play The Night of January 16th. It was pitched to her by producer Vivek Vaswani and debut director Anant Balani. The film was shot entirely in Mumbai and also featured Shekhar Kapur and Ashutosh Gowariker.

Looking back, she described Gawaahi as a bold and unconventional whodunnit. She said Janhvi Kaul was the "other woman" and secretary to businessman Ranjeet Chaudhary, whose mysterious death drives the plot.

Referring to the old clip, Aman said, "This interview clip is from the film set of Gawaahi, and for me personally it is madly nostalgia-provoking. The role marked my return to films after giving birth, and so of course it was also hailed as a comeback. One of many I’ve apparently had since!"

She signed off the post by saying, "I guess you can call me a comeback queen."

What she said about Mazhar Khan

In an earlier interview with Simi Garewal, Aman had spoken about the strain in her marriage. She said Khan had "stopped helping himself" and was causing further harm to himself. She said he had become addicted to prescription drugs and painkillers, at one point taking seven a day despite warnings that his kidneys could fail. She said she and the children asked him to stop, but he did not.

Aman said leaving took a long time because she still cared for him and had fought many battles for him. She called it an act of "self-preservation". She also said Khan's mother and sister later "wanted to punish" her and did not allow her to pay her last respects.

The veteran actor married Sanjay Khan in 1978, and that marriage ended in 1979. She married Mazhar Khan in 1985, and they had two sons, Azaan and Zahaan. Khan died in 1998 due to kidney failure.